Going Home

I have been having such strange and powerful flashbacks of some of my times at home ever since I got my ticket on Saturday. They have been so powerful that I'll be in a great mood for hours thinking about them, or I'll just cry about them.

I remember being in Jr High, my dad was hurt, and after a few days discovered in the Intensive Care in a Chicago hospital. My mom left to be with him for a couple days, and I was trying to take care of my little brothers and sister. I had fixed them a dinner of chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese, when someone from the Kung Fu school came over and yelled at me that I couldn't feed that to a baby (SoeChun was probably 1 or 2), he had to have some vegetables, and he threw away the dinner I had made and brought some other stuff over..

I remember feeling embarrassed when I came walking home one day during the summer, and I had left SoeChun and KeyLyn with my brothers to take care of, and one of our neighbors was picking SoeChun up out of the street in nothing but a poopy diaper. He had been wandering around outside - my brothers were in the house playing Sonic on the Sega Genesis.

I remember punching my dad.

I remember fights with my mom.

I remember making Mikey laugh so hard that he threw up - and had to go running through a house looking for a bathroom with a mouthful of puke.

I remember when KeyLyn was born, we put her in the middle of our kitchen table and we all just sat around and smiled at her.

I remember sitting on top of the counters talking with my mom while she cooked dinner.

I don't know if I'm worried about going home, I think for the first time I am going home and know that it isn't my home anymore. That my life isn't there - kind of weird for me, I am so attached to my family, hopefully for the first time I won't dread having to leave and come back here.

Crap! I have to go to work! I'm going to be late!